Monday, October 13, 2008
A Pitiful Sight
Or should I title this, Down Syndrome, Poor Balance and Siblings Make for a Rough Childhood?
My poor sweet baby boy Sean took a bad fall last night. Aidan and Sean were playing in the back yard, I was sitting just inside the door with Ella. Aidan came running inside and said, "Sean tripped on the sidewalk and fell down! His nose is bleeding!" I laid Ella down & rushed outside. Sure enough, Sean's face and hands are covered in blood and he is crying. I carried him inside and washed off his hands and face. I saw that it wasn't his nose bleeding, but rather several scrapes on his face, the worst one just under his nose. His mouth was bleeding too, probably his gums or upper lip. I called for Doug to come check it out. Oh, the blood! Nothing breaks my heart more than seeing my babies hurt.
So while Doug and I are trying to check things out and comfort Sean, Aidan has a break down! He cries, "No, it isn't true! I did it! I did it! I hurt Seanie!" I asked him what happened. He said, "Sean took one of my papers and ripped it up so I pushed him and he fell on the cement." Aidan's crying almost as much as Sean. I see blood on Aidan's collar. I pointed it out to him and he said "I tried to hug Sean after he fell and said I was sorry but he pushed me away."
A two part problem here. 1) Sean does have a terrible habit of ripping or crumbling up Aidan's drawings. Actually, he does that to just about any drawing, including his own. He doesn't get that they are special to someone else and it hurts their feelings when he destroys them. 2) Aidan easily forgets that Sean isn't so steady on his feet like he is and a little push will topple Sean over.
I am well aware that siblings will fight, and it's unlikely that they won't ever injure each other. I had two sisters growing up and we did our share of shoving and hitting behind our parents' backs. Doug and his brother are just 15 months apart in age and were rough at times to each other. His brother wears a few scars on his face thanks to Doug.
We have tried to teach Aidan that his brother can't play as rough as Aidan can, that he isn't as strong as him yet. Sean loves to rough house with Aidan and most of the time it's mutual fun for them. Usually Aidan is not physically aggressive towards his brother, generally he does stuff to annoy Sean rather than hurt him.
This time, we reminded Aidan that Sean isn't very steady on his feet and he can't push Sean because Sean can fall easily. Technically, I think Sean falls over easily because of his low tone. Even while standing, his body his so relaxed that his balance is easily shifted. We also told Aidan that we are sorry that Sean tore up his paper, but that isn't a reason to hurt him. To be fair, we reminded Sean that it isn't nice to tear up Aidan's pictures, they are important to him and Aidan works hard on them.
Sean forgave Aidan rather quickly, gave everyone hugs and kisses back, as I had been snuggling and kissing on him. Aidan beat himself up about it for quite awhile and drew a picture showing how he felt about it. It depicts Sean standing by the playhouse with blood on his face and me coming to help Sean. He drew himself standing by Sean and next to a tombstone (thanks, Walmart, for your Halloween displays) with his name on it. He said, "this is were I am going to be because I am going to be dead for hurting Sean." I told him that we were not going to hurt him, no one was, that we don't want to see any of our kids hurt and we need to protect each other from getting hurt.
Later, I was catching up on everyone's Sunday blog posts and saw that several of us have some ouchies to share. Some caused by that darn lack o' balance, others caused by siblings.
Snuggles & Blood at Unringing the Bell
Naughty Keeghan at My Special Ks
Max's Black Eye at Life with 4 Kiddos
So I am not alone! Phew!